The Value of Changing Your Mind

Some public figures seem to stand alone in a given field, with no obvious comparisons. I always think it's interesting to note how these people think. Especially the beliefs or decision-making values that seem to be foundational to them.

Foundational ideas are the ones repeated and returned to in different ways, in different scenarios, at different times. Ideas people seem a bit obsessed with. Probably, that obsession comes from having experienced unusual success which they attribute to the idea itself.

Steve Jobs is one example. He stands alone as a unique Silicon Valley figure who forged the biggest and most influential company on the planet, after following a long and winding road, full of ups and downs, to get there — which I think makes it more interesting as an example.

Personality flaws aside, his mind was radiant. Watching an Apple keynote, which he always presented when in good health, could feel like an insight into the way his mind worked. The kind of mental energies he ran on.

What always struck me was that he had ridiculous clarity, and an ability to cut through the bullshit, get to the core, and find a sense of magic there. He was quick and decisive, but also fluid. Sometimes new products would take drastic U-turns, and there would be no explanation given or apology offered. The New Way would simply be outlined, as if nothing had existed before it. Everything ran forwards.

A concept that relates to this fluidity, is repeated in various accounts of him, and can be seen in the directions (plural) he took Apple after returning to its helm in 1997, is the importance of allowing yourself to change your mind.

The idea is that reversing course, changing your opinion, or flat out saying your judgement was upside down, is not necessarily a sign of weakness — or even of bad judgement.

Instead, it can show a flexibility of thought willing to amend "tent pole" assumptions when new facts come to light. Facts that require radical course corrections, making you realise you are on a bad path and need to change lanes before things get any worse.

“Good thinking” can mean investing yourself fully into something, realising that it hasn’t worked, and taking an eraser and simply wiping the board clean in your mind. Starting afresh with something that could actually work.

Adaptation is key to survival, and thoughts and judgements are the most adaptable things we have. They need to adapt to match your environment as it changes, or as the fog lifts and allows you to see things more clearly.

Changing your mind, and knowing when to, is important. It shows a lack of the stubborness that makes people foolishly double down on their mistakes, putting blinders on as they continue charting a course into the rocks.

Changing your mind can also be an incredibly difficult thing to do. It requires strength, even once you see it is necessary.

Changing your mind about someone (to the negative)

Sometimes we invest a lot of hope and belief in someone. We find ourselves trusting them completely. Especially, at times when we most need someone to trust. This is also when we are most vulnerable to seeing what we want to (or feel like we need to) see in someone else. As a result, it might turn out that those things might not actually exist.

When we make unusually positive judgements about a person it can mean we have put blinders on, projecting good things into them rather than reading good things from them. And maybe those good things we project into the person make them feel good, encouraging them to go along with who you think they are. They might glibly act like the amazing person you want them to be. A timebomb of hope and delusion.

This kind of situation makes us tune out warning signs we would normally pay more attention to. We can overlook or excuse away all the negative things, and exaggerate all the positive things. Which is not healthy, not wise, and definitely not sustainable.

At some point reality will enter the picture. When it does, you might have to make a quick decision. Change your mind, with both diligence and decisiveness, or be swept down the river of false hope, through the rapids, and onto the rocks. Where you will likely die like a fool.

Changing your mind about someone in this way can be insanely difficult. It means really listening to your head, after your heart has been dominating for some time. And the things your head will start telling you might feel like they are tearing your heart to shreds.

Regardless, when intelligent instincts force themselves to the front, screaming at you to listen, you gotta listen. A big change is likely required, and dragging it out won't do any good. Once you know you have to, it's best to change your mind decisively, without emotion, in a sure-footed way. And be honest about where you stand, if that is asked of you.

Changing your mind about someone (to the positive)

First impressions count, and misunderstandings happen. At times people make a negative impression on us, and we hang onto this negative impression stubbornly. We refuse to give trust based on an initial judgement that we might have been too quick to make.

There can come a time when, as experience allows us to see more of a person, our instincts tell us we were wrong about negative judgements we made at the start. Maybe something happens that puts someone to the test, and it reveals in them admirable traits you never knew were there.

When this happens, it takes strength to change your mind and re-evaluate a person to the positive. To acknowledge that you were wrong, and that they are not who you thought they were. Or maybe they are to some degree, but you come to recognise other qualities that are more important, and make those flaws seem less significant than before.

The foolish thing would be to cling onto negative judgements once they have been invalidated. Keep in mind what caused your initial negative impression, and make sure your new evaluation is based on something real, and they have not just buttered you up or put a social con on you… but when you know you were wrong, it's time to change your mind.

This is especially true when you have backed yourself into a corner you feel like you can't climb down from without losing face. Taking the easy path, to stay your course even when your instincts are now saying you made a mistake, is a weak move.

Don’t be the fool who doubles down on a mistake because they are not big enough to admit to them. Change your mind, and own your mistake. It is a moral imperative. Go forwards with your course corrected.

Changing your mind is something that applies in infinitely varied contexts in life — not just your assessment of people. A few more examples:

Re-evaluating the value of something after significant investment. Anything: an idea, object, ideology, belief system. Once we invest (time, money, work) into something it becomes more difficult to change our mind about its value. That can lead to disastrous outcomes.

One example is cults and cult-like groups, where this resistance to changing your mind after significant investment is used (along with other methods) to make their followers feel psychologically trapped.

Changing plans. If we make plans, it can get us stuck on a track that might lead to nowhere. Plans should always have fluidity, and be open to being changed midway through or scrapped altogether. If they are not getting the right results, something needs to change. Changing our plans, and knowing under what circumstances we need to change them, should be part of the plan.

A common theme runs through all of these examples. Simply put: the value of changing your mind is to stay nimble and able to change direction as your environment changes around you. It also means accepting that bad judgements are inevitable in life, and that part of good judgement is allowing for, and planning for, them.

In this way, we can recognise when we are heading into the rocks, and steer ourselves decisively away from them while it is still possible.

James Lanternman writes movie reviews, essays, and moonlit thoughts. You can reach him at [email protected].

Previously… Test All Relationships